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Still around but I don’t have much to say.
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1.1 hours of me playing world of warcraft. This program is really cool.
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Here I am
Sitting upstairs at my desk when I should be on the bus to class. I can easily justify skipping this class because it is only one class.
I’m in a funk, and I don’t exactly know how I got there. I think I can piece together many tiny things; no friends, family lives far away, my mom’s complete denial and utter lack of respect towards my relationship with Sara. I think that last one is really a huge thing. I feel sometimes I am just out in sea, and the only person who keeps me from really floating away is Sara.
I think sometimes I am hurting her because she sees me constantly struggling, beating myself up, and constantly being hard on myself. I just don’t know what to do with myself. I have had a year to figure this out. The only thing that I have come out knowing for sure is that Sara really makes me happy. I want her in my life for as long as she can handle me.
We don’t have any money and I see how it effects her, and I don’t know. Maybe I settle for doing the same thing over and over and over and over because that is what I have done for years. I realize that’s all I have ever done, and I don’t know maybe that lifestyle is comforting, but it’s not making our relationship at all easier.
If I can just pick a stupid associate’s degree, the government will continue paying me benefits for at least two more years or when I finish my degree. I don’t even know what I want to be. I can’t even decide what degree to go for. I have no idea what I want to do. All the jobs I have gotten, I had no idea about them, I never done them before, and in the end I ended up liking them. I think the only thing I know is I want a job that pays decently (anything over $12 an hour) and has some kind of variety. Do I just write things that interest me on a piece of paper and draw it out of a hat? Do I want to sit in front of a computer day in or day out? I’ve done that for a few years now and I’ve learned I don’t like it.
I end up resenting my job, growing bored, and losing any kind of motivation I have. Do I pick working with computers? I love computers, but I don’t know if I could handle working with them day in and day out. Maybe I should just jump into something I have never done, at the very least if I hate it, I could do a job, make good money and go back to school…
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Wish it was big enough for my monitor.
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I loathe this guy. Why would you want to send your loved one an e-card with this douchebag’s face on it? I used to read his site, and I had to stop because everytime I would go I would become more and more disgusted and pissed off. He has no ethics or morality. He is a stain on the gay community, and a disgusting person.
I really hope someone punches him again and maybe this time get’s it right and knocks some sense into his intolerant head.
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crunch time
I realize that it’s getting closer and closer to crunch time. I need to figure out what I want to do and just do it. I don’t want to wrack up crazy loans, and I also don’t want to work myself to death and not enjoy my life. I might just take the path to where I get into a career that caps around $40-50k a year and call it quits. I just want to do the things I want to do, and to spend my life with my fiancée. Have a decent apartment, one day get a little car, jam on my guitar, take photographs, and play video games.
To me that sounds like the life I want. I am almost 29 and I still don’t know if I want kids, but I just want to have a comfortable life.
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(currently the background on my android)
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Sick
I hate the prelude of getting sick. I think it’s worse than just being sick. You experience each symptom, and it seems like it’s intense and hyper-blown out. When your head hurts, it’s pounding in pain. When you breath, your throat aches even more than just not breathing. Every time I swallow it hurts, so I try not to swallow. My bones and muscles hurt.
My fucking eyelids are sore. MY EYELINDS! Sitting in my computer chair hurts, playing video games which requires me just clicking on shit makes me ache. I hate feeling like this. I’m either super hot, or extremely cold.
Let’s hope I am not sick for three months again.
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SEX DRUGS ROCK AND ROLL tee and a cool gas mask t.
Finally getting out of my basic black tshirts that I’ve been doing for a few years now. -
enjoying a 4 day weekend
and recovering from the side effects of going off one medication and getting on another.
About
I live in Olympia. Haven't got a clue what I want to be, but the outcome will be me helping people.
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I have cracked the Ke$ha code.
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doom-gloom:(via glitzandglammer)
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Tee of the Day: “Propaganda” by Michael Temim.
Zombies of the world, undie!
(TFA: One day only!)
[teefury.]
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(via dethjunkie)
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I was walking into Whole Foods yesterday, just behind a woman in Ugg boots. That’s bad enough, but this woman REFUSED TO LIFT HER FEET WHEN SHE...
